We left. We came home. We all survived.

A year and a half ago or so Shel and I won a cruise through a hockey fundraiser.  We could never take it.  There was cancer and death and then the girls came and I don't know about in your family but I don't have alot of people knocking my door down offering to babysit 6 kids for a week.  And so that winning ticket expired in December, 2009 never redeemed.

In March my sister casually mentioned that she had found incredibly cheap flights to Disneyland (as in $37 cheap) and would we or could we consider going with her.  So, on a whim,  I called the agency we had won our cruise through and asked if there was any way that we could convert our expired prize for a cruise for two into a family trip to Disneyland.  And they said yes.  I was shocked.  A cruise we didn't really want to take could turn into a family trip we REALLY did want to take.  The only glitch was we had to take the trip by June, 2010. 

Alas, in March we did not have custody of the girls.  They also did not have passports.  Plus they are 14 and 24 months old and although the idea of leaving the girls behind was awful, so was the thought of trying to drag them through Disneyland. 

I don't leave my kids.  Ever.  At least not willingly and not happily and oh the guilt as I even considered taking the boys to Disney for 5 days while leaving the girls behind in the arms of adoring relatives.

The guilt, I tell you,  was crippling.  Which might have been why I didn't mention it on here. 

We took a week, then two and talked it over.  Finally I came to a conclusion, there was no way possible I could pass up on the chance to spend this time with the boys in Disneyland for FREE.  They too deserved this amazing opportunity and the girls, well, they would have to survive without me for 6 days. 

I prepared and planned and fussed and worried.  A four page typed schedule left behind. A photo album of us, blankets made to smell like me, lots of time spent with those who would be caring for them.  I pulled out every attachment resource I could find to prepare the girls for the separation.  Although excited for the trip I was quite honestly sick with worry. 

So we left and had an amazing trip.

We got to spend some big kid time with some incredible brothers who really, really deserved some focused attention from mom and dad.

 

And then we came home.  Antsy might be an apt word to describe me as we pulled into the driveway.  All those fears, worries and stresses came flooding back.  Had I set attachment work back a year?  Had I destroyed the girls' trust in me?  Would they be angry?  Hurt?  Mad?

Happy girls had been fine being doted on and spoilt rotten by those that love them. And now they were so happy to see their family.  Excellent eye contact, lots of cuddles and oh the joy to be reunited.  It was a good thing.  A very good thing to go.  It was a very good thing to be home.

Summer Reading

As a young girl I would often lose myself into books for hours on end, much to the chagrin of my sister who would much rather have had me interested in playing street hockey with her. I have no time to read myself nowadays, but I have passed this love of reading on to all the boys. Our house is overflowing with books, and often we take a trip to the thrift store to buy huge bags full of their ten cent novels. Books however have never held them in their grip for hours on end as I remember my long summer afternoons sprawled on my bed thoroughly unable to escape from a book's grip.



Giving birth to a child who is a clone of their father in looks and personality is an interesting experience. Tanner is an absolute joy but there is very little of ME in him whatsoever. He has been completely and totally his father's son. Tall, lanky, peaceful and sensitive, just like his dad.



And then there was the summer he was 11. Here is a selection of pictures of Tanner's week in Saskatchewan.

He read in the library...

He read in the kitchen ...

He read outside while he was "babysitting" ...

Now obviously a love of good books comes from both sides of the family as there are 2 formal libraries in my husband's parents home, as well as book shelves and reading chairs in every room, including the kitchen. But for once I see a reflection of my own childhood in my son, and it was nice. He was reading the series Jacob Two-Two by Mordecai Richler.

We drove. And drove. And drove. Two nights straight through to get there, with a day to play in between.

Looking across the open prairie of ripe Canola in the far distance you can see the spire of the church. Its the rectory of this church that Shel's parents and sister bought and restored.

Then you arrive at the art house and everything about it feels like a sanctuary.

Shel's family chose to share their faith through art.

They hold this value dear and it shows in all they do.

And we arrived and settled in. Tomorrow you can glimpse a bit of our time together, and the inside of the amazing rectory.